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Life Testimony presented at 2017 Eastern Africa Regional Bible Conference

Jesus Is the Way and the Truth and the Life

By Dr. Moses G. Lee (Gwanak 3 UBF, Korea)

“Jesus answered, ‘I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.’" (Jn 14:6)

I. The nightmares repeated and I cried to God!

    I was born on October 3, 1961 in South Kyeongsang Province of South Korea. My family was a big traditional Korean family, with grandparents and uncles and aunts living together in one big house. They all loved me very much. When I was a child my grandparents and parents would always tell me, “to be a good boy!” From that time on this became my personal motto “Be a good boy’ during childhood. ‘Be a good boy’ in the Confucian Korean society first of all meant that I should be obedient to all the elders. At school I excelled in classes as well as in extra-curricular activities. In middle school I participated in a quiz game and won the prize and it was broadcasted throughout the whole region. These are examples of how I attempted to be a good boy wherever I was. When I graduated from high school, I was a wonder boy. I even got accepted to study at Seoul National University Medical School, which was regarded as one of the best universities in Korea. I was very happy and my family was also very happy for my success. But in reality it was also the beginning of my despair. In the sixth year of Medical School I went through two years of premed training. This training was easy and that was a problem for me, because it totally disturbed my way of life for three reasons. 

First, I lost my way. I could no longer distinguish the difference between good from bad as I used to do. The university professors no longer encouraged me to be "a good boy." Instead an emphasis was placed on recognizing the evil of goodness and the goodness of evil. These were foreign concepts to me. It turned my world upside down and made me go in circles. I became very rebellious, suspicious and I was confused about myself. Second, I lost my morality. I began seeking  a promiscuous lifestyle. I drank, smoked, danced and I even fought with other guys on the street. I dated girls and changed my relationship with them one after another. Through these immoral relationships, I found what was really in me--selfishness, lust and pride. The immorality deprived me of many precious things I had had before. I lost peace in my heart and a smile on my face. I lost my brilliance in the classroom. I felt unstable and dull. Feelings of guilt grew more and more in my heart. My conscience told me that I had lost my way and I could not find any alternative way. Third, I lost my life-purpose. Originally, I wanted to be a man who is respectful and nice to everybody. I wanted to do very meaningful things for my society throughout my life. But instead, I found myself under the spell of materialism and competition. 

    At that time by the grace of God a Christian friend gave me a Bible and invited me to his church. It was the very first time I had read the Bible. I was shocked when I read this verse from the bible, “Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it” (Matthew 7:13,14). I felt like I was on the way to destruction. It was very hard to understand why Jesus is the only way for all people throughout generations. But those words were stuck in my heart making me think about my destiny in life. I was very much afraid of God. In my third year in Medical School I began to have nightmares every night. In my dreams a large snake and many small snakes appeared and rushed at me. A very horrible and hideous dream! I couldn’t sleep because of these repeated dreams. These nightmares revealed who I really was. I was not an able young man but a powerless and miserable man full of fear. And I could not but help think about God from the stories in the Bible. I thought of the Almighty God and wondered if He really could understand human dreams. Then one winter night I began to cry out to God: “O God if you are the God of the Bible, if you are still in heaven, if you are really almighty, please help me, please save me from my nightmares…’ As I prayed I found myself shedding a lot of tears.

II. Jesus saved me and blessed me as a Bible Teacher

    I really wept crying out to God in desperation. Then heavenly peace and happiness came into my heart. It was a different kind of happiness from that I had experienced before. I was sure that God heard me. Surprised and scared, I said to God: “O God, I want to live as a true Christian. Help me and lead me please.” God was very kind to me. God gave me a strong conviction in my heart. It was the time I experienced the grace of God. Then God sent me a Bible teacher who was looking for a student at the Medical School. In my Bible study on Genesis chapter 3 I learned that Satan was that snake! My goodness! I met him in my dreams! I knew how powerful and fearful it was. But God said, “Its head would be crushed by the Messiah.” I believed the words as written. Then I became very brave and overcame my dreams. I felt I could overcome those nightmares in the name of Jesus Christ. Defeating the dream became the proof of God’s faithfulness to me. God restored smile on my face. 

    Through Bible studies I found the truth of all creation. I believed in the Creator God. I knew that the Father God is my everlasting Father. I was deeply moved by the wonderful life of Jesus Christ. His humility and sacrificial life always touched me. Jesus prayed on the cross, “Father forgive them for they do not know what they are doing” (Lk 23:34). I realized that this is a prayer of real love and truth. I repented of all my sins before God and accepted Jesus as my Savior and Lord. I confessed that what Jesus said was true; “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me" (Jn 14:6). This happened to me at a Summer Bible Conference in 1986.

    After that I began to teach the Bible to other students what I learned from it. Teaching the Bible to other people was another secret of the truth. It enlightened my heart and filled my soul with happiness. I had to struggle every day but I really loved teaching the Bible because I felt the Holy Spirit residing in me. God also used me as a Bible teacher for my family that was deeply rooted in Confucianism. My sisters were the first to go to Church. By God's great grace I married a woman of faith Maria in 1990. Maria was the first Christian in her family also. She loved Jesus Christ even deeper than I did. I found true love in her through our marriage. I could serve God's flock through my house church. This brought me so much satisfaction and enabled me to be more successful in my career. 

    But I experienced some troubles along the way. My Bible teacher died in 1994 at the age of 50. I had to fight against the power of death and powerlessness. I also faced some difficulties in caring for my Bible students. Some left the church. I felt sorry but I still loved them. Through these experiences God taught me to know the sinful nature of human beings and myself. Maria and I continued serving God's flock and never stopped serving Bible studies. God also blessed my family with two wonderful sons, Moses and Joshua. They were my spiritual source of joy and energy. From 1993 until 2003 my family participated in pioneering Gwanak (Seoul National University) campus. I realized that God had been with us like He had been with the Israelites for 40 years in the desert. In the end, God enabled us to raise a strong UBF church. 

    Life is long with many ups and downs. Until my mid-fifties I thought my life was going so well in God's great grace. All the people around me praised me and my home. I enjoyed some social activities like playing golf, skiing, and playing instruments in the orchestra etc. People said that my family and I are a role model for Christians in this generation. But it was not true. The troubles of life came to me very unexpectedly and cruelly. 

    In February 2014 my father passed away. After his death a big family conflict arose over the inheritance. It seemed to tear my family apart. I found the selfish and greedy nature in me and my family. It hurt me a lot. During that time my second son Joshua became obsessive with the idea of 'The Last Day' influenced by an African pastor on You tube. Joshua gave up school for a year and tried to go to Israel, saying that he would be a martyr for this world. In the end he needed psychiatric consoling. I was in a state of chaos and confusion. I could not sleep and I cried. I could not do my job. Making matters even worse, one of my sisters also wanted to get a divorce. It shocked me further. These very shocking and sorrowful events left me frustrated and burned out. 

    I realized that I was blind about life and I felt psychologically unstable. I could not eat, sleep or care for my patients. I felt I would totally collapse. I lost weight and I was diagnosed with diabetes. I felt I had hit rock bottom. Shepherds and coworkers prayed for God's mercy on me and my family. Maria prayed for me a lot every day. She cooked many kinds of delicious food every morning. In the deep darkness there were two things I could strongly grasp. One was Bible study and the other was prayer to my Lord. I made up my mind to study the Bible more faithfully. I knelt before God day and night where and whenever I could make time. By reading the Bible I tried to look into my life. I found that God was teaching me through these troubles so that I could experience heavenly peace through Bible reading and reflection on the words of God. 

    Through the struggles I could see myself honestly before God. I knew that I was a mere sinner though I was helping others as a Bible teacher. I realized that I had been constantly selfish, self-centered and immoral. I found that sometimes I lied, I was adulterous, arrogant and ignorant in the sight of God. This realization made very sorry. Amazingly, through repentance and prayer, God gave peace and power in my heart again. Then all the difficult situations around me subsided and the terrible problems were solved day by day. In February of 2015, just a year later I felt I became a new man. I felt that I was born again. God taught me that Jesus Christ is the way and the truth and the life for me and for all the people of this world. Now I am helping four students every week at SNU and DKUH Medical College, delivering the Sunday message at Cheonan UBF once a month. God is working in me more powerfully than before. Praise Jesus who saved me and used me as His witness! 

   Since 2015, God helped me join African ministries. African missionaries invited me to their Bible conferences and gatherings. I had many opportunities to pray for African ministries. Last March when Msn. Mark Yoon sent me an invitation for the Eastern Africa regional conference, I could not refuse the invitation even though I had just returned from the Uganda medical mission two months earlier. Most importantly this time I came with my lovely wife Maria! I believe God is really blessing Maria and me even more through His African ministry! We want to obey God to the end! 

One word; Jesus is the way, the truth, and the life!