"Here is a trustworthy saying that deserves full acceptance: Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners-of whom I am the worst." (1 Timothy 1:15)
1. Christ Jesus came to save sinners like me.
I am Mary Cowen. God blessed me to establish a Christian family with Jeremiah Cowen from Milwaukee, WI, in 1987. God blessed us with three precious children. He also blessed us to serve campus mission at the University of Wisconsin in Milwaukee for 5 years. We moved to Chicago where my husband received UBF staff training. For 4 and 1/2 years he had to battle with brain cancer. During his sickness, the kingdom of God became real to him. His inner man became strong and sanctified. My husband faithfully led family devotion, reciting John 3:16 and many other Bible verses. He love me as Christ loved the church. He visited the campus every day to teach the Bible, until he passed away and went to his eternal home.
I became a widow at the age of 40 with my three little children who were 9, 8, and 6 years old. Dr. Samuel Lee and mother Barry visited me and taught me to love Bible study and encouraged me to have living faith. Dr. Samuel Lee gave me, 1 Peter 1:24, 25. It says, “For all men are like grass, and their glory is like the flowers of the field; the grass withers and the flowers fall, but the word of the Lord stands forever.” The word of God gave me a living hope. I decided to live the rest of my life as a Bible teacher. Now it was my turn to lead family devotion daily. Setting an example for my family was always in my mind. When my children cried and missed their father dearly, I prayed for wisdom on how to explain to them that their father was physically gone, however, his spirit lives with God in heaven. Our family had numerous joyful moments together in our home, especially my two sons are very humorous and my only daughter is sweet.
When one of my children got their first 'C' on his report card, I felt as if my grade as a mother and a missionary was also a 'C'. When I felt as though I was a mediocre missionary and a mother, I came to God in prayer. Every morning, God gave me strength and comfort. When I worried about provision, God provided everything we needed. When I was stressed, God gave me the gentle stability and peace of mind. God, Our heavenly Father, has been with us. God's promises are trustworthy. God gave loving discipline to my children by providing many Bible teachers and good friends for my children. During their teens, I came to see that my lifestyle as a follower of Christ would influence, guide, and leave a legacy for my children. However, one day, my son asked me, “Mom, it looks like we just live an ordinary life. What is really like to live as a missionary?” In frustration, I replied, “I work hard to support our family and I also have several Bible students. What do you mean that I do not live like a real missionary?” I came to realize that it is important for my children to see my daily life as a missionary and share my inner struggle.
After serving God for 29 years, I have come to see learn more deeply what it means to live as a missionary. Serving God requires constant transformation of the inner man. Transformation happens when I let the words of God convict me of my sins, leading me to repentance and allowing Christ to reign once again at the center of my heart. I must have the growing kingdom of God in my heart! My sins of selfishness, fear, and doubt were still inside of me. I had to show my children that as believers we are never to give up on holiness and disciplining ourselves to become more like Jesus. My cute children were not angels but sinners like me. Each and all of us desperately needed the grace of Jesus who could forgive and save us from our sins. Thank God that we have good news, "Here is a trustworthy saying that deserves full acceptance: Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners-of whom I am the worst."(1 Tim 1:15) By God's grace through Jesus, I served Loyola ministry and brought the good news of Jesus to young students on campus. God blessed me with junior high & high school ministry along with my children at Taft HS.
God continued to refine me and my family through my brother's illness and death. My dear younger brother became a bold Christian, inviting his friend to come to Jesus even in his sick condition. Before he passed away, he told my father, “Do not worry about me, because I am going to be with Jesus. And we will all meet again in the kingdom of God.” I realized once again how extremely short our time on this earth is. This caused me to continue life with a new sense of mission. This is when God put the many missionaries' children in my heart who were about to attend the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign. My daughter was going to be a freshman there, too. I felt that I had to be there and help out. Through prayer, God gave me the courage to obey Jesus’ words to go and make disciples of all nations. I was 50 years old. On June , 2007, I resigned from my job, sold my house and moved to the U of I with my three teenage children. My oldest son Jeremiah encouraged me, saying, “Mom, it is a new mission field for you.” And God blessed us after this decision. It was not easy to see my children beginning to live as independent adults. But it is God's will. Now by God's grace, Jeremiah is working as a personal trainer in LA. I believe that God will call him to be a servant of his word like prophet Jeremiah. My daughter Miriam carries her Bible, though she may forget to take her cosmetics in her purse. Excited about the word of God, she went to Kenya to sing for the children and the sick. At the U of I, she serves as a worship leader. My youngest son, Peter, is growing strong in the grace of Jesus, studying diligently and sharing his faith at UIC.
2. My house is a world mission house
(Look at the screen)That's the living room in my house. It is open for God's work. The work of God started at U of I in 2005 by Sam and Grace Sun Lee with Romans 1:5. Dr. Nathan’s family came as coworkers. Both families opened their homes to serve God's work. Mark and Anna Yang supported them in prayers. My house is called the “World Mission House.” These houses are located in the middle of corn fields. On Fridays, as a sponsor of small groups, I opened my house to students, cooked for them, and prayed for them. Then God opened students' hearts to his word. I got to know young students' struggle and I became young in heart. Though I was a middle aged woman with gray hair, I was hanging out with young and energetic students. Last year, we rearranged Friday meetings into undergraduate, graduate and house churches. Students were growing as leaders. We had house church meetings in the World Mission House. These house churches have become vital prayer supporters for student ministry.
My children were growing as coworkers. John Jeong’s family and Abraham Song lived with me. We could work together in one spirit as a spiritual family. Pastor Sam encouraged me daily by asking, "How is your BP(Bible study and prayer)?” Sam loves Bible study just like his father. I began to read the Bible minimum 5 chapters a day. Since I came to Champaign, we have studied more than 16 books of the Bible. And I was challenged to study the Bible as a whole and in depth. I was also moved by Grace's tearful prayers for God's children. We often prayed together.
By God's grace, I have studied the Bible with every missionary’s child, about 12 of them at the U of I. I had no time to relax in order to prepare Bible study materials with much prayer. The parable of a prodigal son helped me to find their core issues and resolve them. It also impacted my attitude as a Bible teacher. When being confronted with their core issues, our children identified themselves with either a younger prodigal son or a self-righteous older son. The core issue was a heart issue. Their hearts had to be right with God by loving God from their hearts. They grew up in Christian families. But they need to acknowledge that they are sinners who need saving grace of Jesus. God tempered my gospel faith, when several coworkers left the ministry. Through all this, I learned that loving and caring for one person opening my life and my home to students is sharing the gospel of Jesus.
When I lost my school job last year, worries began to come into my heart. In order to find God's purpose in this, I began a prayer walk around more than 50 buildings on campus. Grace and Gloria joined prayer walk. When we walked by chemistry building, we prayed for Josh Tice and Sammy Lee. During prayer walk, I recited Mt 6:33 again and again, "But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness. And these things will be given to you as well." Then God helped me start a new Homestay business. I provide food and lodging in my home for students from overseas who come to the States to attend school. I also provide spiritual and educational support for them. God provided for all my needs, even a brand new car.
Last semester, I mentored the girls' small group. Their friends joined as well. The girls are growing in joy and love for Jesus and the gospel. This summer, women missionaries, Liz and Hannah, are studying English diligently and talking to five people on campus each day. I learned how to make sushi for out-reach. Each house church is doing daily devotion and does out-reach on the campus. My future vision is to continue to serve our missionary's children and to build up new missionaries. I pray for our young people to take deeper roots in the gospel of Jesus and establish house churches in the future.
God has been faithful and good and gracious to my family no matter what our circumstances were, and we praise and thank him for all he has done and is going to do! I want to finish my report with my key verse. "Here is a trustworthy saying that deserves full acceptance: Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners-of whom I am the worst." ( 1 Tim 1:15). May God bless you with this gospel of Jesus!
